Manchester Psychotherapy

Counselling in Manchester

TA Today by Ian Stewart and Vann Joines

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Category: TA Psychotherapy.
Target audience: TA novice – expert.
How challenging is it to read? Most of it accessible – some bits for more experienced TA practitioners.

Clients often ask me to recommend one book they can read to increase their Transactional Analysis knowledge when I work with them delivering therapy.  TA today is that book.  It has been the standard text book of Transactional Analysis trainees now for many years, mainly because it is well written, comprehensive and understandable.  There are parts of the book that are targeted at the more advanced practitioner but if you don’t understand those sections straight away they will open up to you as you become more knowledgeable.  The book includes exercises at the end of each section to engage the reader, but there are no answers anywhere so you determine the correct answers by reading the book.  Most of the exercises are self reflective anyway, so only you know the correct answer!  This in not exactly a bed time reading book (though as a TA geek I have often treated it as such) due to its text book like density, but what it lacks in entertainment factor it makes up in thoroughness.

I’m not going to go into the contents of the book here because it would require me to list all of the major ideas and concepts contained within TA.  Suffice to say that they are all in there!  Some could argue that the book is starting to show its age too, it was written in 1987, but as it is a basics book I don’t think that matters.

One question that comes up now and again is why this book is a better read for those new to Transactional Analysis than  Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy by Eric Berne (the Author of Games People Play)? After all, it was Berne who founded TA.  The answer is two fold.  Firstly, TA has moved on and developed since Berne.  There are many other important contributors to the theory since Eric laid the foundations and all of these extras are included in TA Today.  Secondly, Berne’s books are far from straight forward to read, maybe with the exception of  Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships.   The others can be dense and certainly not recommended for the casual peruser!  I like to look on them as personal challenges, a bit like climbers may view Mount Snowden (they are not quite in Everest territory).

So if it’s Transactional Analysis basics your after, TA Today : A New Introduction to Transactional Analysis is a great starting point, a comfortable meander over rolling hills maybe?

If you’ve enjoyed this review, or disagree in any way, please comment below.

Buy the book:  TA Today : A New Introduction to Transactional Analysis Click on the (affiliate) link to be taken straight to amazon.  This will get you the right edition of the book instantly!

Anxiety: How To Reduce Your Anxiety Levels

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How to reduce anxiety levels

Negative self talk can be a big problem for many people.  How many times have you done something stupid and then beaten yourself up verbally?  When we start listening to our thoughts we often find that we are our own harshest critic.  The technique I am going to talk about here can be used to distance you from your thoughts.  It’s a basic ACT method known as defusion that I teach to my clients .  When we are having thoughts it is common for us to start listening to them and treating them as fact.  The reality is that we are not our thoughts. Thoughts are just words flowing through our heads, they have no power.  So how can we separate ourselves from our thoughts?  Try this:

A fictional person we will name “Jim” suffers with social  anxiety.  He may often have the thought  “Nobody finds me interesting” when in company.  This is a thought, it’s not a truth. When we fuse with our thoughts we accept them for truths – never great if we want to believe in ourselves.

Let’s take that thought and acknowledge that it is just a thought.  Jim would say to himself,

“I’m having the thought that nobody finds me interesting“.

This has moved the thought one step away from an accepted truth.  Next, Jim can move the thought two steps away with,

“I am noticing that I’m having the thought that nobody finds me interesting“.

This thought is  now much further away from accepted reality and can be examined from afar.  Jim is now separate from his thought, he has de-fused with it.

Finally, Jim can acknowledge where the thought came from – his mind,

“I’m noticing that I’m having the thought that nobody finds me interesting – thanks for that mind“.

Jim can now go into company much more detached from the anxiety he would normally feel when surrounded by others.

I’m not suggesting that Jim would not feel any anxiety when surrounded by others.  He is, however, in a better place than he was before and he can choose to accept the feelings that come up for him if he knows that being in groups fits in with his values (more of that in a later blog).

Your homework?  Try it then come back to this post and leave a comment about how you found it.  It doesn’t matter what the thought is, if it’s not useful to you you can defuse from it.  And remember, you are not your thoughts.

If you want to read more on defusion and other ACT techniques, check out “The Happiness Trap: Stop Struggling, Start Living“, by Russ Harris.

Transactional Analysis Core Principles

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transactional analysis core principlesTransactional Analysis is one way of understanding human personality. It was the brainchild of Eric Berne who trained as a psychoanalyst but became disillusioned with the methods he was expected to follow and wanted a more equal approach to the therapist/client relationship.

There are three basic philosophical assumptions in Transactional Analysis:

1) People are OK. This roles off the Tongue easily but I think it’s important to examine what this means. This is the fundamental acceptance that regardless of what you do, no matter what you think, or despite your feelings you are a worthwhile, valuable person in your own right. You are special. Everyone is special. We are all as important as each other. How amazing is that as a first principle?!  This principle carries itself directly into the theraputic relationship between therapist and client.  We are both equal.  We share the responsibility of cure.  To make sure that both therapist and client are sure of what their goal is, TA therapists work with contracts – a clear written down agreement between both parties stating the goal of the therapy taking place.

2) We can all think. If we have all got the capacity to think then we have all got the capacity to work out what we want and work out how to get there. The therapists job is to support and guide you in this task but you do not need anyone else to decide for you. You know what’s best for you.  For many clients entering therapy it may not feel this way when they start.  Some feel confused and unsure and are looking for the therapist to tell them what to do.  The therapist will work with the client on clearing this confusion.  It’s a bit like wiping condensation off a mirror so we can see ourselves once more.

3) People decide their own destiny and have the power to change these decisions at any time. If we got to where we are today because of the decisions that we made then it’s within our power to change these decisions. We can be who we want to be and achieve our goals if that’s what we choose to do.  I’m not suggesting that this is always easy.  Small changes may start the process and build up to larger changes when it feels safe.  It’s about getting around the barriers to change together.  Sometimes they need kicking down, sometimes we go round them and sometimes we realise that although they look like they are there, when we examine them up close, they are not there at all!

If you would like to have transactional analysis therapy in Manchester with me, use my contact form above or ring me on 07966 390857.